His plan....

A year has passed since an update on our adoption blog. A year full of birthdays, football games, school events, family fun, and lots and lots of prayers. 

And, a year of many changes to our adoption journey.  

Where shall I start?

First, rest assured. We are still adopting. That's the beginning AND the end of this story. And now for the in between....

Over the last year, we watched in anguish as our projected wait time to referral grew longer and longer. and longer. When we contracted, our agency cheerfully and confidently advised us to expect to wait 18-24 months for referral. If that were true, we'd have had our "referral call" by now, and would be preparing to travel to Africa. Instead, our new projected wait time as of right now is an additional 4-6 years. YEARS. If at all. Things are not stable. Corruption is real. International adoption is not guaranteed. We were told this going into this, but also reassured that Eth*opia is a very stable country. Not to worry.

As we were delivered the new time lines....things were also stirring in our hearts. Are we meant to stay in this program? Are we supposed to wait it out? It didn't feel settled. It didn't feel right, or real. What in the world was God telling us now? We felt so sure that He had called us to adopt, and more specifically from Eth*opia. So why are we doubting it now?? Why, does it not feel right anymore? Jaden is all the while growing older, nearly 8 at this time. In another 4-6 years, he would be a teenager, not even caring about being a "big brother".  And, WE are getting older too, Do we really want to wait so long to start over? And, as vain as it may sound....but a question many of you probably wonder....What about ALL the $$ we have invested??? The fees, up in the 10's of thousands, are not refundable. Not a dime. So, we lose a large portion of money that we earned, fund raised, and were gifted. Blah. Some options that were presented to us were to do a concurrent adoption, meaning from another country, or a domestic adoption. We didn't need to think about that much, because we knew we just could not make it work financially. TWO adoption fees just isn't in the budget.

What is your plan for us, Lord? We are trying to be obedient....Why would you want us to change our plans when we have invested so much?

As we were struggling with coming to a conclusion, a decision....A facebook message from a friend read this,
"How is your adoption going? Are you interested in fostering?"
Well, actually, yes....the thought had been hovering over us, even though 3 years ago we had thought we had closed that door...saying absolutely not, not for us. But now, 3 years later....It's been in our minds.
She continued on....
"Because there is a little boy who will probably need a forever family......."

I paid little mind to it at the time. It was nearing Christmas, and we were busy of course. Plus it being a very emotionally draining Christmas, I just didn't have the energy to investigate the situation. I let it go....
Another message a few weeks later, asking this time if we are pursuing becoming foster licensed. Because this little boy still needs a family.

I'm listening, Lord.

I have always said that I can't hear when the Lord whispers in my heart. No, I need Him to send me a text message. Clear as day, telling me what He needs me to do. I guess I will settle for a Facebook message, coming through a friend.

Honestly, the next steps after that came so EASY. Just easy, like it was always what we were supposed to do. Things fell into place, and the process has been so smooth. Like God is paving the way for us. We spoke with the family caring for the little boy a few times, at first to gain more information. It was so clear that we were supposed to move forward with getting our foster license so that WE could be this little boy's forever family. So we did, and are expected to be licensed by mid-June. Oh, AND....not only is there a little boy....but also a girl too. :-)

What will happen from THIS point on, only God knows. We are planning for these littles to come to our home soon...like in a month or maybe a little more. Unfortunately, we will not know if we will welcome them until AFTER we are licensed. In the mean time, we are getting to know them, spending time with them when we can. Preparing a bedroom, Preparing our hearts, and Preparing Jaden's heart. Praying that this is, in fact, part of His plan for our family. When they come, we will be their foster parents for a while, and will transition to adoption when it is allowed. We want them forever.

As far as our other journey....Well, that door will need to close to allow these littles to come. Our agency, unfortunately, does not allow us to be foster licensed while waiting for a referral. They will, in fact, terminate our contract. SO, we will wait to be officially licensed, then terminate our contract with All God's Children, International. It's actually sort of bittersweet. For years, we have pictured what it will be like to get "that call", to see a part of our world that we probably will never get to see otherwise. We know, though, that when God closes one door, there is always another that opens for us. Why He led us to Eth*opia, I will probably never know. Maybe to open our hearts further to ALL orphans, not just ones in different countries. Maybe it was simply to pray for some of the families I've "met" along the way, in their times of need. I do know one thing though....that we are not only "ok" with the decision to change paths, but actually overjoyed!

At first, it was actually really hard to accept that, financially, we would be at such great loss. I felt so guilty. Our friends and family have supported us so generously. And then it dawned on me. God doesn't care about the money. Not one bit. So, while we are still so thankful and grateful for the support from others, we had to just breathe and say....It is what it is. :-)

Whew. Is anyone still paying attention after that book?? Hehe. And that's the short version!

Please continue to pray for our family. In the months to come, we will sure need it. I'm sure there will be specific things to pray for in the future, but for now if you all could just say a quick prayer that the rest of this process goes smoothly? Thanks :-)

I can't wait to see this unfold before our eyes. Whatever does happen, I feel peaceful in that God is in control of our lives, and of these little kiddos lives. Stay tunes, folks. ;-)

A snail's pace

Haven't posted on our blog in a while. Not much to say, I guess :-) Still waiting, waiting is hard, moving at a snail's pace, waiting is Hard, life is busy around us while we wait, waiting is HARD....

Have I mentioned how hard it is to wait for God's perfect timing? Harder than I ever thought was possible.

Our April waitlist #'s are....#103 girl, #86 boy. We only moved 2 spots on the boy list. Waiting. is. HARD.

We don't fully understand what is going on in Ethiopia. Government is slowing adoptions, requiring more and more paperwork all the time. Kiddos need homes, parents need kiddos. Yet it remains so much more complex than one can even begin to explain. Babies are dying while waiting for "paperwork" to come through. Hearts breaking here.

Folks, can I ask you to pray? RIGHT NOW!!!! Get down on your knees, on your faces, humble yourselves, and PRAY to our Lord for Ethiopia, the government, all involved in adoptions, and most especially for the kiddos, their birth families, and their waiting forever families. PRAY for paperwork to come through on waiting kiddos, PRAY for Ethiopia to process adoptions quickly and smoothly, PRAY for broken hearts and waivering faith. PRAY NOW, and everyday!! I am praying for God to move mountains in Ethiopia. Our child is there. Thank you all.

"Are you even close YET???"

"You must be gettng close to be getting your child, right???"
"HOW much longer are you expecting to wait?"
"It's GOT to be getting close now, yes??????"

"Are you serious????You'll be waiting at least another YEAR??

If this were a game of jeopardy......the "question" would be "The Questions most people ask pertaining to your adoption", hehe!!!

We are 7 months into the wait.....and we are expecting to wait another 17 or more months. Yep. 17 MORE months!!! We recieved our January waitlist numbers, and we are officially #107 girl and #91 boy!!

What's that you ask???? I'm forgetting to tell you the sibling #'s?? Nope, not forgetting...We actually made some changes to our parameters in the last couple months. We felt like we were putting "conditions" on this thing that God has called us to do. Like saying, "We'll take one of your children, but only a certain one." The more we thought and prayed about it, the more that didn't make sense to us. What if OUR child whom God has chosen for us is not 12 months and under? So, we have updated our parameters to include ONE child age 0-30 months at time of referral. We still put a limit on the age....but figure that would make our kiddo about 3 when he or she comes home. Our agency has a strict birth-order rule in that they will not approve a child who is older than children already in the home. We also thought that, since we don't home-school, bringing home a school age child would be too much a challange for us and the child. And why not siblings anymore? Well, our first parameters, that were willing to accept siblings, came from my heart, not from reality. We realized that we felt it would be just too stressful to bring home more than one.....worrying about bonding and attachment with one will be challenging enough....2 would put more stress on ALL of us. Also, money factored into this....Our children will be attending a private Christian school, which we LOVE, so we had to bear this in mind when thinking about the coming years, paying 3 or more tuitions. Plus, it is an additional $9000 PER CHILD in referral fees, not to mention that many more airfares to pay for. It just wasn't feasable. So, we are now praying for our TWO children.....Jaden and Little Nichols.

Changing the parameters doesn't necessarily mean we move up on the list. We still have the same numbers, meaning there are that many more families ahead of us. But it could be that the families ahead of us are waiting for an infant....so if, perhaps, we were number #40 on the list, and all the families ahead of us are waiting for an infant, and a toddler comes into the orphanage.....then all 39 of those families would be bypassed and we would recieve that referral. :-) Make sense?

If I analyzed every little detail about the waitlist, and the parameters of each family ahead of us, I would drive myself crazy. Trust me, I've tried, and finally said....you know what???? God's got this. He knows. It will be what it will be, WHEN it will be. God's GOT THIS!!!

More to come.....I don't update as much as I used to, I know. This is the boring part of the journey, for all our supporters, anyways!! I feel your prayers, though......I know you're there. Thank you. :-)

1 year

One year ago today, we recieved this email from All God's Children International:

 

"Dear Kevin and Jamie,

I just wanted to follow up with an email to let you know that we reviewed your formal application and you have been approved to move forward with the Ethiopia program."

 

Our lives have forever changed since we read those words. We spent 6 months gathering and notarizing documents like you would not believe. We've been on the waitlist for another 6 months. We are preparing to wait another 18 months to be matched with OUR child. In the last year, I can say that I have felt every. single. emotion. known to man. And even some that are only known to woman! There is not even an hour that goes by that I don't think about our little one. I gotta be completely honest....More often than not, I am just plain scared. Terrified. Unsure. Uneasy. Completely and totally unprepared for what's to come, because, really.....I have no idea of what's to come. I'm reading books. I'm googling like crazy. I'm praying, oh my glory I AM PRAYING!! I'm telling you, if you ever want to go head to head with Satan, all you have to do is say YES to God. Doesn't matter what He asks of you....for us it was to adopt one of his precious children. All has gone pretty smoothly in our process thus far.....but the enemy knows we are doing God's will, and I know that it is the enemy that puts fear and doubt in my life and mind. I am doing my best to deal with that.

 

The thing I keep going back to is that as much as I am scared, unsure, uneasy, terrified, and unprepared.....Guess what. So is our child. A million times more.

 

Don't get me wrong.....I am also a decent amount of excited!! There is nothing that I love more than being a mom. It is what I prayed for for SOOO many years. How could I not be excited about the honor to love another little? We have, since joining the waitlist, witnessed many families bring home their babies from Ethiopia, and each and every one of them say the same thing. As hard as it is to wait for your child, as hard as it is (sometimes) to parent these fragile and sometimes broken children, It is so so so so worth it. Oh my glory, He will redeem. I put 100% of my faith in this....He will redeem. He will redeem because we said "YES".

 

Could I ask for a quick prayer from each of you...every day if you think about it....just pray for us and our child. :-)

 

Sooo....would you all like to know how we are progressing on the waitlist?? As of December 31st, we are #108 girl,  #93 boy, and #47 siblings. yay for double digits on the boy list!! When I think about how much longer we have yet to wait....I think about this.....In 2012, AGCI helped 90 children home to their forever families. So, since we are 93 on the boy list, there is a REALLY good chance we will meet our child in 2013!!! Oh, we can only hope and pray!!

 

Thank you all for your continued support, and prayers. stay tuned.....I promise to update more, I missed November ;-)

 

 

 

 

 

 

4 months down.....

4 months on the waitlist. 20+ to go. To say our October waitlist numbers were disappointing is an understatement. Our official #'s are Girl 116, Boy 100, and siblings 50. Not much movement.....hardly any referrals have gone out in the last couple months. The "veteran" adoptive parents I am in contact with say that this is the norm. When I say that I am disappointed about no referrals are going out, I want to mention that I in no way wish that a family be broken so that we can get our child.....It sounds kinda bad when I replay it in my head. :-) What is disappointing is that while there are plenty of kiddos that NEED us, most of them are "unadoptable". Read on......

I want to explain some things about the waitlist and referrals. So far, the number one question folks ask us about our adoption is "when will you get your child?". "What?! 2 years? why so long? Aren't there millions of orphans?' The answer is yes. There ARE millions of orphans.They all need families.  And, while there are not enough families to cover all the orphans (sadly), there are plenty of families waiting to bring one or MORE of these littles into their family. I wish it were that easy. Unfortunately, the USCIS (dept of homeland security) is VERY peticular about allowing a child to be adopted. There has to be documentation that the child is an orphan, and they are very meticulous about this. The Ministry of Woman's Affairs in Ethiopia has also, in the last year, slowed waaayyy down in the number of adoption cases they process daily.  And, to add to that, the agency that we have contracted with has it's own set of rules about the children they accept into their orphanage. AGCI has to feel that the child will clear embassy with no difficulty before they accept that child. Which means that they do their own research about the background of the case on top of the research already done by the government. So, you can see now why it takes so long. There was a time a couple years ago when an adoption could be completed and the kiddo would be home in 9-12 months. Our agency is telling new applicants now to expect 24 months, and LONGER. Ugh.

While the wait is tough, we are so glad that we chose the agency that we did. We like their approach to adoption. They are in it for the children, and there to find families for children, not children for families. They partner with only select orphanages, and do not seek out children.

Did you all know that it is National Adoption Month? Is it coincidence that it's the month to be thankful as well? ;-) So, If ya know any adoptive families, give them a shout out, will ya?!

Thanks for following us, all!! Stick around, the best is yet to come ;-)

Yep, we're still waiting!

3 months on the waitlist.  And, some days more than others, it seems as though there is an eternity still to go. Today is one of those days, unfortunately. It feels like that 41st week of pregnancy when you so long to meet your child, to kiss his head, to smell his hair. You know that day WILL come, but the wait is heatbreaking.

Galatians 6:9 says this.... "And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up."

It's God's version of "just keep swimming, just keep swimming...." :-)

Our waitlist numbers came in an email today....not much movement, but any movement, I'll take!
We are officially # 117 girls, #101 boys, and # 47 siblings.

All else is good.....Jaden is getting the hang of 1st grade, that took a few weeks to adjust to. His teachers are all very pleased with him, and so are we! Kevin and I are coaching soccer this year, and we are busy with life in general.

Our next fundraiser is TOMORROW! LimeBerry is a self serve frozen yogurt place, and they are hosting a fundraiser for us, and when you come in and purchase between 4-8 pm we get 20% of the sales to help with our adoption costs. The location is on Tumwater BLVD, by the airport.

I'll also be getting our online auction together, and will be starting it mid-october. It will be on my personal Facebook page, as this is the easiest way to manage it. If you want to be a part of it, shoot me a friend request. I'm under Jamie Nichols. I'm pretty excited about that one, I have lots of neat things to auction off!!

Thank you all for your prayers and support!!!!!

August numbers (a little late!)

Ok, so I am really terrible at updating out little blog these days. Sigh!!! Everytime I sit to update, I think about the laundry that needs folded, or lunches that need made, or Pinteresting that needs done (lol). So, our new numbers are...... #121 girl, #103 boy, and #49 siblings!! Moved up a smidge. Just a smidge.

What a busy summer of getting absolutely nothing accomplished!! A camping trip, a trip to Silverwood, some church activities, some little day activities....that's all I can remember of our summer, yet we were crazy busy!! Now school has started again, and I am starting to feel some sense of normalcy again! I am so glad to be back in a routine. I do thrive on routine!! Jaden started 1st grade last week at Centralia Christian School, and is already loving it. Hope his thirst for learning continues.....We were working on some online learning games tonight, and one of the options was a math game. He said "oooh, that one looks fun!" Yep, math is fun, Bug!!

We had another very successful rummage sale this last weekend, bringing in nearly $2200!!! YAY! It was fabulous! Unfortunately, though, we have decided to cancel the Bunco night. Just not enough interest in it.  God continues to pave the way to our little one.....sometimes with little pebbles, sometimes with big stones. I am learning more and more to just keep trusting, and to keep my faith in Him. We have some amazing prizes that were donated for the Bunco, though.....so I am going to be having an online auction in the next month or so with these prizes, and more!! Looking for donations for this auction if anyone would like to donate. It can be really anything new. Crafts you make, something from your business, baked goods, canned goods, really....ANYTHING!!! Let me know if you have something to donate. We are also still collecting cell phones...I've enlisted one far away friend (thanks, Cam!) to collect EVERY used cell phone in Texas, maybe you could do the same? It's easy to do, let me know if you are interested.

Our next fundraiser will be September 29th....At LimeBerry!!! It's simple.....Go to the LimeBerry on this day(the one by the airport in Oly) between 4-8pm. Order. Pay. Help our little one come home!! BRING YOUR CREW!!! We get 20% of the profit from these 4 hours, so the more that show up, the more we get!!

I'll close with this....A letter to our child....

To our precious little one-
We are waiting for you. You are probably not even born yet, maybe just a glimmer in God's eye at this point. And yet I love you. I love you like you are here, in our house, and have been with us since the beginning. My heart has a special place for you, my little one. We are preparing for you as we wait; reading books, saving vacation time, adjusting our finances, preparing the heart of your big brother, and most of all, VERY most of all.....we are praying. Praying for you, that your heart will be strong, and you will be healthy, and you will adjust to becoming a part of our family, to our world....it will be so different here, little one. We are also praying for your birth family. I cannot in a million years imagine having to give up my baby, for any reason. We pray that they will find piece in thir hearts, as they give you up to a better life, for whatever reason. I also love your birth family, little one, for the gift they are going to give us....YOU. We are also praying for us, and everyone in our lives. This is going to be a huge adjustment, my sweet baby, for all of us. You are not going to be very sure about us, , and we are going to do our very best to ensure you are safe and healthy. We are new at this though. Parenting you will be different, with different issues, and we are praying that God gives us the knowledge, and the strength to know how to handle issues.

I must admit, little one, while I am excited, I am equally as scared. I know God is by our side. After all, this is HIS story, we are merely the supporting actors. We are His sheep, He our shepard. And for this reason, I have faith.

Little one, we will do everything in our power to give you the life you deserve. We will teach you love, love of your family, love of your Father in heaven. We will teach you right from wrong, and pray that we do this well. We will teach you what God wants from you, what you can do to serve our mighty God. And we will love you. That you can be sure of. We are your parents, you are our child.

So, for another 1.5-2 years, we will pray daily for you and love you more and more with every passing day. You are so worth it. God thinks so, and so do we.

With much love, sweet baby.....

Momma.